I’ll Go Back To Meds..

So 2016 hasn’t got off to a great start. Seems depression and anxiety are constantly fighting it out to be priority in my life right now. As a result things have started to spiral to the point I’m now bordering on agoraphobic, I barely eat, and where I was insomniac I’ve now gone full on nocturnal. Seriously I have the same sleeping pattern as my cat!

My ability to keep up a normal act is slipping. I can’t make myself cook or clean the house, I can’t make polite conversation. All I want to do is hide away from the world and it’s beginning to show. My few friends are fed up with my delayed replies to their messages. My mother is upset I haven’t been asking about her job or her hospital appointments. I know to them I’m selfish and uncaring which only fuels my own self hatred. But recently I just have no energy for their problems, it’s taking everything I have to get through each day. Yet I cannot explain it to them without the comments ‘maybe you should be sectioned’

So tomorrow I have an appointment with my doctor about going back on medication. I tried several different drugs last year that were about as effective as popping skittles, but to be honest I just don’t know what else to do.